Entrepreneurship & Risk Evaluation

Chapter Ten

Entrepreneurship & Risk Evaluation

My complacency caused me to be like the little dog in the back of the car window: I just kept bobbing my head in agreement. Yeah, I was Bob the bobble head just bobbin' through life like a lifeboat bobbin' in the swells of stormy seas. I was a peacemaker; or so I thought. My reasoning led me to believe that if I just agreed with everybody, we could escape conflict. I attempted to become what I thought people wanted me to be. I lacked the courage and confidence to risk being the real me.

Risk can be a healthy part of relationship building. You need risk to become more than you are. Knowing when to take a risk can keep you healthy and safe. A Mentor must have the ability to exhibit vulnerability and be willing to risk losing a relationship. Doing the right thing involves risk.

AID to MENTOR NAVIGATION Part 19

I heard a story many years ago about a lady who eventually succumbed to dementia. She was in her late seventies and was now confined to a home similar to a hospice facility. Her lucidness would fade in and out like billows of fog on a windy mountain top. Her daughter-in-law was sitting with her during one of her moments of clear thinking. She asked the old woman her what she would do differently if she could have the opportunity to live life all over again. The woman's eyes sparkled as she said: "I would sing!"

She began to tell her daughter-in-law about her singing story. When she was a teenager, her life ambition was to sing. She wanted to go to school and learn more about music. She wanted it to be her life profession. The young girl's family vehemently opposed her dream. Her father said: "That's nonsense! You need to learn a skill that pays like a seamstress. You need to be able to help support your family when you get married. Never mind this singing foolishness!" The young girl did as she was told.

She became a seamstress, a wife and a mother. The years went by. Everyone grew old. The lady began to falter a bit as she continued with her story. Tears formed in her glassy eyes. She spoke haltingly and said: "If I could do it all over again, I would sing. I would take a risk and follow my heart. I would sing!" After several moments of silence, the old woman with dementia began to sing. The sound of her voice was alluring. Those who heard the beautiful song coming from the hospice room melted into tears. Doctors and nurses paused in the hallways to listen to the enchanting voice. Soon thereafter, silence descended on the tear stained listeners. The old woman's voice trailed off into murmurs of confusion. Her song, delivered in a moment of sunny lucidness, had been replaced by the dark confusion of dementia. She died soon after. She died with her song still locked in her heart. She sang in the throes of death, her song that was intended to give life. She never took a risk.

Take a risk my friend. Your risk may be the key that unlocks and opens a whole new life in the people you Mentor.

AID to MENTOR NAVIGATION Part 20

Life has many dangerous situations that can be life threatening. Many of you may never encounter someone whom you are Mentoring that will put your life in danger. Some of you will live on the cliffs of life. We take gang members mountain climbing in the Adirondacks. From the top of a mountain, the views are fantastic! The greatest view in the world however, is the look in a child's eyes that says: "Ah Ha! Now I know what love is!" The term "At-risk" is used primarily to describe inner city children. ALL CHILDREN ARE AT-RISK!

Taking a risk and being at-risk are two distinctly different situations. The temptations in life to engage in self destructive behavior are now more pronounced that at any time in history. All children are at-risk when it comes to drugs, sexual abuse, pornography, alcohol, violence, low self esteem, prescription drug abuse and more. NEVER ASSUME that the child you are Mentoring leads a perfectly sheltered life free from any of these problems. Develop a relationship that allows you the possibility to discuss openly the tough issues of life. The child you Mentor may be safe but they may have a friend who desperately needs help.

There are some children who will hurt you. The woundedness they carry prevents them from trusting anybody. They protect themselves by burying their pain deep within their hearts and lashing out at others. They live by the principle that says: "I will hurt others before they get a chance to hurt me." Use wisdom in how you live your life as a Mentor. Whenever possible, make sure you are not alone. Privacy for conversation can be found in public places. Develop an open line of communication with every significant influencer in the child's life - both good and bad. Be aware that jealousy may rear it's ugly head through a parent who envies your relationship with their child. Show them respect and honor their authority when possible.

I will not give you tips on how to survive as a Mentor to gang members. I do not like to use the term "gang member." Be careful with whom you use that term. Be careful with whom you divulge personal information. If you know someone who is breaking the law, you are obliged to share that information with the proper authorities. Please be mindful of the fact that your words about someone can be used to build conspiracy charges against someone perceived as a "gang member." A young person may have had a horrible past that law enforcement officials may gather as evidence. We believe in forgiveness, the law does not. Please understand, I am not advocating that we absolve people from accountability. There are young people who have done time in jail because of crimes already committed. Their convictions were at the local level. Sometimes Federal law enforcement officials step in and use conspiracy charges to add on more convictions and extended jail time. How many times does a young person have to do time for the same crime?

Everything you do will involve some sort of risk. Your greatest focus regarding risk needs to be on the young person you Mentor. How will your actions affect their future? The risk of who you are will dictate the risk of who you will be - young people are watching every move you make.